True Courage in the 21st Century

Die for your country, shoot an 800 pound grizzly, work 72 hours in a row on an oil rig in Louisiana. All certainly courageous ventures, and ones few of us could do. In my humble opinion, true courage in this world, and what inspires me, is when someone tells another person they love them, and mean it. Now, consider that the other person has hurt you, or done the most despicable act known to man? Could you forgive him, or her? Do not confuse this with condoning, or agreeing with, or even understanding their actions for that matter, but truly forgiving them. Absolute, unequivocably forgiving someone who has wronged you in some way.
My good friend Michael called me mid December 2008 after falling off the face of the earth for awhile. He had been struggling for sometime, and decided to go back to his native California to get back on track. Unfortunately, the time there made things worse. What little confidence he had was sapped away, and he was a scared, nervous, shell of a man. In his late 40's, there was a hint of desperation in his voice on the phone that day, but Michael is a strong man, and he can act pretty well. My employer, Rancho Management, had been growing in leaps and bounds, and were open to enticing new employees into the company at the time, so I mentioned to Michael that he should come down and let me show him what we do. He was shovelling Boxing Day snow for us within a week of arriving back in Vancouver.
Michael is a talented handyman, and he learned his trade from his father, who took on a multi-year renovation project of a Church in San Francisco that had been condemned, and worked pro-bono. Despite enjoying working alongside his father, he decided to join the priesthood. Excelling in the profession, he eventually had to resign as a result of separating from his wife. So marked the downfall of Michael, and when I met him for the first time in 2003, despite appearances, the slide was starting. Plagued with self-doubt and guilt, Michael got so bad he could hardly take care of himself, and was mired in debt. As a contractor, his perception of himself allowed others to take advantage of him, and as his self-esteem was so low, he didn't really care to find a way out. But all he needed was a different way to look at things.
I taught him a simple little cognitive skill that involved separating what really happened, and what we PERCEIVE happens. For example, Michael's mom would always say things like "I hate you" and "you're good for nothing". Where he disserviced himself is that he allowed his mind to mirror his mother's words exactly. So, when his mother said "You're good for nothing", Michael believed it entirely. He hadn't learned how to think for himself, and it is a skill that oftentimes we must learn ourselves. No school system teaching us this, unless it Montessori. After Michael started separating his mother's words from himself, things started to change. His power went through the roof, and he was able to quit his job and declare he was going to Haiti to help in their rebuilding efforts. That was courageous. What was more courageous? He told his mother he loved her, and wrote her a letter of forgiveness, without expecting anything in return, after years of separation and seldom words spoken.
What happened? Well, nothing immediately, but Michael told me today his mother wrote him a letter he received last week that said she loved him, and that she wanted to learn all about the life he has now.