Why Arent I Doing What I Love?

I caught myself in one of the most destructive patterns that has shaped my entire work career yesterday. A local guy was chatting with me about his tshirt manufacturing business, and I immediately started thinking I have to do that too. I have to talk to people, I should make lots of money in business, I need to network. The fact is, I hate networking. I find it boring and ridiculous. I like to have fun talking with people, not trying to get them to buy my widget by the truckload. Most know I am a person whos all for stretching oneself and going outside of the envelope, but when I feel ill just thinking about having to do something, that is the sign.

So, why not see what is possible for myself living into a world of fun, attraction, attention, interest, ease, passion and creation? I let go of a world of struggle and doing what I am supposed to do.


http://everydaybright.com/2011/02/why-arent-you-doing-what-you-love/

http://www.ted.com/talks/gary_vaynerchuk_do_what_you_love_no_excuses.html

http://www.joyful-work-for-sensitive-people.com/

And now, its 6:42 pm, and Ive agreed to meet Connor at 7 pm at Quetzal Trekkers to talk about volunteer teaching English to a group of 14 to 15 year olds tomorrow. All the same old stuff is coming up for me and I am feeling stressed in only 15 minutes. I feel really worked up. All the same old jason brain stuff is coming up right in my face and I am finding it really hard to cope. Feel like I am falling off the edge of sanity. All because I feel SO scared to screw up in front of someone else.

I am considering telling him it is not really my thing. Its a confusing situation, but in my own reality, I cant deal with a class not being perfect. And so I miss out.